Nine. Twenty Nine.

1. He calls it his “war hawk.” It’s a plastic parrot. All in the naming…

2. A lone yellow flower still in bloom.

3. I dumped his cereal on the floor. I am so tired of catering to his every & so many fears.

4.  I thoroughly enjoy organizing. Then I come back to my reality. 

5. Traumatic. Disappointment.

6. I am already done with this day. It’s 8:15. In the morning.

7.  They had a picnic in the sunshine on a dark blue blanket.

8. Joy is the best makeup. -Anne Lamott

9. But first, some rebellion.

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Nine. Twenty Seven.

1. “I am profoundly enchanted by the flowing complexity in you.” -John Keats

2. Celery, onions & carrots in the soup pot. The triumphant trio. Always a great beginning.

3.  He called someone a poop head. Preschool profanity.  

4. Always thinking about efficiency. What if I pondered enjoyment?

5.  Is there something more important than happiness? 

6. Shift

7. “The marvelous thing about a good question is that it shapes our identity as much by the asking as it does by the answering.” -David Whyte

8. “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild & precious life?”. -Mary Oliver

9. May we ask the deep & important & best questions.

Nine. Twenty Two.

1. No matter how pretty the printable, it will not cook the food or clean the toilet. 

2.  She wanted all the kisses to feel like whispers of hope & enough.

3. Storytelling for soul connection. 

4. The spirals we live in.

5.  Capturing what if feels like, not what it looks like. 

6. Showing a way, not telling.

7. I do not aim to connect with others, so what the #&*$ am I doing here?!

8.  On my own hormones, I live further from an edge. Mostly.

9. I think eyebrows & an iris tell secrets we often wish to keep.

Nine. Twenty One

1. Craving soup (still) even though it is so hot (still).

2. All things take time. Boo. Sigh.

3.  Small significant steps daily taken produce long lasting results. I just want to do it once, really well, & be done. 

4. My patience pants are short & tight & wearing thin.

5.  Polka dot feathers always make me smile.  Thanks guinea fowl!

6. Waking up at two in the morning & not falling asleep for at least an hour is getting so old. 

7. Strobe lightning last night.

8. He let me scratch his back just after waking up. Sweet, slow start.

9. I do not know where to begin.

Nine. Twenty.

1. Hurt blocks creativity. I just want this hole gone.

2. Purple flowers in honor of my mother. She text me “Goodbye C have a nice life.”

3. Nails lacquered in pitch black.

4. Eyes will be lined too. Accessories as armor & an outward expression of an inner sadness laced with anger.

5. “…to write is to note down the music of the world.” -Helene Cixous

6.  Today I shall be…quieter. Listen to them speak.

7. Visiting a local farm to touch bunnies, look into the big eyes of a cow & laugh at goat antics.

8. “The deepest dream of silence is the beauty of music & word.” -John O’Donohue

9. Walk in beauty.

Nine. Nineteen.

1. When you wonder the exact pattern, amount of blood in your eyes & scar made from bashing your head into a mirror. #parents

2. When your mother tells you to stop caring about her & your dad. What does one reply?

3. Thank you to the sweet lady who watched over my child while I used the restroom. You are an angel.

4. He rolled down a hill to make his sister laugh. He is amazing.

5. He gave us each a hug & kiss & said “I love you.” My heart melts.

6.  She continues to hurt me in new & inventive ways. 

7. I think stationary is a simple pleasure filled with hope.

8. The breeze was like a touch across my skin & playing with my hair.

9. It is growing harder not to hate her.